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Are men who are attracted to trans women, gay? (video)

Cyril Mazur
This post was last updated on .

If there is a question that comes very often, whether it’s asked to transgenders themselves, or asked to men who like transgenders, it’s definitely that one! Does it make you gay, if you are attracted to ladyboys?

The answer is not as straight forward as you might think. And actually, what does it mean to be “gay”? Are straight and gay two strictly distinct categories, and everybody falls into one or the other? At what point does dating transgenders make you fall from the straight category into the gay category?

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Men who like ladyboys are gay?

Back in 1948, American sexologist Alfred Kinsey conducted a study that shows that sexual orientation is not as simple as being either straight or either gay. Actually, sexual orientation is best described as a scale, with one extremity being totally straight, the other extremity being totally gay, and in between an infinity of possibilities. Nobody is never 100% straight or 100% gay, we are all a combination of both.

So, short answer: men who are attracted to trans women are pretty straight.

Trans-oriented men

First of all, trans-oriented men define themselves as straight. And it’s not because they’re gay in denial! It’s very common that you see men who like both genetic women and transgender. But it’s very rare that you see men who like both men and trans women.

Actually, gay men don’t like trans at all. For a gay man, a transgender woman is way too much of a woman for him. Gay men just go for other men, they like masculinity.

A good proof of that, is shemale or tranny adult videos (or trans adult videos). You will never see shemale adult content on a gay adult website! Shemale adult videos always has its place on straight adult websites instead (amongst the other categories, big breast, brunettes, etc!). Shemale adult videos is clearly targeting straight men.

More clarity

When a trans-oriented man sees a trans woman, he basically sees a woman, not more, not less. Like anybody else actually. Let’s take for example a beautiful and passable transgender woman, she is walking in the street, and you look at her. You have little chance to be able to tell that she is in fact a transgender woman, right. If a man is attracted to her, he is attracted to a beautiful woman, and that’s a very straight attraction. He has no clue of what’s down there (nor does it matter), and knowing it doesn’t make him less of a straight man.

What you see is what you get, literally. Trans women are women on everything (except this little exception, and it depends on gender reassignment surgery…), therefore it’s making men who are attracted to them, well, pretty straight.

If you had to put trans-oriented men somewhere on the Kinsey scale, they would definitely not fit next to the gay extremity, but rather pretty close to the straight extremity!

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About the author

Cyril Mazur
Cyril Mazur is a trans-oriented man dedicated to helping ladyboys and trans-oriented men find love wherever they are in the world. He is the Chief Executive Officer and Founder of My Ladyboy Date. He is a serial entrepreneur who obtained his MSc in e-business in Oxford in 2010. In 2019, he was part of the panel of judges for the Mandaue Gay Pageant. He founded My Ladyboy Date with his co-founder Maki Gingoyon in 2013. They have both made it their goal to provide a safe space for trans dating and end the stigma surrounding trans relationships.

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Comments (7)

  • Thanks a lot Maki for your view of things. I generally agree with you and your explanation fits my feelings as a man.

    Compared to other explanations floating around the net, yours is certainly most accurate!
    I know a lot of "straight" men are struggling to come to terms with the whole topic.

    I think one of the reasons is maybe, because there is no "simple" label for this attraction, yet. Humans like simple labels like "straight" and "gay"/ "lesbian" (or homo/ bisexual).
    Many feel uncomfortable if they can't easily pinpoint with a word, what their feelings and preferences are.
    • My Ladyboy Date
      Thank you!

      It's not yet widespread (nor is it seconded by researchers or whatever, because researchers don't care much about this topic...) but we commonly say "transoriented men" or "transattracted men", if ever labels matter, this seems the most correct to us
  • I kind of always knew this... I have been married to genetic women (because it was what society expected) but had always been attracted to the femininity of a transgendered woman. I think it is why those marriages failed! It took a lot of years to finally say "enough is enough" and make up my mind to seek a relationship with what appealed to me most, the transgendered woman, and through your site, I finally found her!! Thanks for a great and honest site!
  • I don't consider myself to be gay. When I drive down the street I never see a guy and think "Wow, he's really hot." There is just no attraction at all.
    But I would like to have a realtionship with a ladyboy. I don't know if I would use the term straight or bisexual. I guess I just don't label myself.
  • I’ve never met or knowingly met a trans woman but there are plenty of attractive trans women in the world. If I met on and there was an attraction between us I’d definitely see where things went between us. I am bicurious but when I see an attractive trans woman it’s more a straight attraction I have. I just see them as a woman, it doesn’t matter what’s between their legs.

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