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Sexual roles in Ladyboy dating

Maki Gingoyon
This post was last updated on .

If you’re new to this type of dating, your thoughts are still probably unhinged when it comes to having intimate moments with ladyboys. Today’s topic is a little NSFW so I highly recommend for you to read it in utmost privacy.

Which role to play when making love with ladyboys ?

If you’re planning to make love with a ladyboy, it’s vital for you to understand the different bed roles first. There are a LOT of them in the world of ladyboy dating and this is why it’s truly exciting to date women like us. Just like what Hannah Montana said in her song’s lyrics,

“You get the best of both worlds!”.

Frequently Ask Questions about Making Love with Ladyboys

If you’re still in the premise of having your first-time with a ladyboy, you’re going to come across terms such as:

  • vers-bottom
  • top
  • bottom
  • vers
  • vers-top
  • and more.

It will be quite confusing but we will get to it in an easy-to-digest breakdown.

ladyboy on bed

There are a lot of things that first-timers want to demystify. I don’t blame you. If I were a guy who’s just starting to have an affinity towards ladyboys, I’d have a lot of questions too. For now, let’s answer the most frequently asked questions when it comes to making love with ladyboys.

What is a Vers Bottom?

Vers-bottom means a person who is mostly on the receiving end when it comes to pumping, yet is amenable to doing the pumping as well.

Vers was used as an adjective because the main subject that best describe’s this person’s preference when it comes to love making, is being a “bottom”.

couple in bed

Albeit being okay with topping from time to time, this type of ladyboy will highly likely be more satisfied if she’s the one who’s bending over. But from time to time, she will also relish the moment of entering your hole.

The perfect match for a ladyboy like this is somebody who’s vers-top.

Does making love with ladyboys make you gay ?

First of all, let’s get into the nitty-gritty of the definition of what gay men are.

A gay man is a cisgender male who prefers to make love with MEN.

Do you think that ladyboys are men? If you’ve answered no, then you’re not gay.

straight guy

However, if you’ve answered the other option, you’re still not gay. You know why? Because vers men who are straight exist. Moreover, what you think of yourself does not define and validate a ladyboy’s womanhood.

By thinking that you’re gay because you’re planning to make love with a ladyboy, you’re not only further confusing yourself. You’re also putting ladyboys’ gender identities in a state of reduction.

You see, when you make love with ladyboys, you’re going to operate a eggplant and a butthole. You’re not going to operate a vagina. If the latter makes you feel more of a man and is the only way to validate that you’re indeed a man, you’re better off playing with a kitty.

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Three Bed roles in Ladyboy Dating

It is quite funny to talk about this but admit it, it is interesting and also exciting. I would like to get more intimate and tackle making love (as what I prefer to call it) which is one of the most essential parts of a relationship.

couple in bed

Compatibility is IMPORTANT in the Bedroom

Being compatible is one factor that would help you build a happier relationship. It also opens up a world of more diverse positions. Few online ladyboy dating sites include bed roles as part of one’s profile information. So what is this role all about?

This role would somehow, determine if you are compatible with the ladyboy that you are dating. So take a deep breath and let’s dive into these various bed roles.

 1) Top

This role is very common to gentlemen. Being top means, you are the one in charge of pumping your partner.

If you choose top as a role, this means that you are aroused and pleased every time that you pump your partner.

The pumping that I am talking about is when male genitalia enters the cave. This bed role is not only limited to your male partner; for there are ladyboys who are mostly non-op transsexuals that prefer to be top.

 2) Bottom

Basically, this is the opposite of the top. If you are bottom, then it is you who’s on the receiving end.

When you find receiving your partner’s genitalia through your hole pleasurable, then that means you are bottom. Regardless of position, if you are the one being pumped by your partner, then you are bottom.

This role is very common to ladyboys, although there are a few men who are aroused and pleased being bottoms, but they are very few. Having a boyfriend who is bottom is not bad after all as long as you are top. That’s one great example of a highly compatible couple.

 3) Versatile

This is a combination of being top and bottom.

You are versatile when your bedroom behavior finds pleasure whether you top or bottom.

You are the type of person who is very flexible and don’t mind whether you are pumping, or being pumped.

So those are the three bed roles that usually apply in dating a ladyboy. I believe that by understanding what these roles are all about, your search will be a lot easier.

These are not determining factors on why you fall for someone, but rather, one of the few important elements that makes a relationship satisfying.

Posted in Informational
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About the author

Maki Gingoyon
Maki Gingoyon is a transgender woman and trans rights advocate in the Philippines. She is the Co-founder and Chief Operating Officer of My Ladyboy Date. Her advocacy focuses on bringing awareness to trans issues and ending the stigma that surrounds trans relationships. She has used pageantry as a form of increasing trans visibility. She was the winner of Queen of Cebu 2010, Queen of the Sky 2013, and the Mandaue Gay Pageant 2017. She recently competed in Miss International Queen Philippines 2023 where she won Best Advocacy. She continues her advocacy by helping trans women and trans-oriented men find love.

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Comments (6)

  • I can't believe no one is discussing this subject because if it isn't somewhere on you mind you probably aren't human. I am pretty new to this site but not new to the World of the Ladyboy. When I see the line that says "Sexual Role" I immediately wonder about different degrees of Sexual Role. The clearest and most easy to understand is "Bottom." i believe this means the LB wants always to be treated like a woman and have love made to her. When I see "Top" I wonder if this LB is aggressive, just likes to take a dominant role,,or does not enjoy penetration herself. Lots of questions arise here as to just how "Top" is this person. The third is "Versatile." This is my personal favorite and the vaguest of the three ares. When a LB says she is Versatile does this mean she likes to give and receive, does it mean she will give but would rather receive, or that she truly loves all the pleasures that intimacy can deliver. It is not the initial impact of the "Sexual Role" category that I would question, but the vagueries of each are that sets my mind to wonder. What do you think? I wouldn't mind know what the facts and perceptions are fro either men who love Ladyboys or especially from the Ladies themselves
  • I have found that tgirls use versatile in two different ways. One means they can be both dominant or submissive but are otherwise traditional bottoms in that they will only be penetrated. Others use it to mean the enjoy both penetrating (top) and being penetrated (bottom). The only way to know is to ask. Personally, I think most transoriented men are also versatile to some degree. I generally prefer the role of a top, I am a hetero male, after all. But with the right partner, I find the bottom role to be very pleasing. I want my partner to be happy too, and if she wants to top me on occasion, it can be very intimate and rewarding. I am mainly a top. A versatile top I guess.
  • Actually I prefer my dates to be versatile, I get great pleasure from giving oral and being bottom. i'm lucky that the ladboys I date are happy to oblige, one is only into topping and receiving oral, she likes back play but not being taken. Having a ladyboy who is bottom only gets a bit boring, but plenty of guys like that..
  • Shayne Stevens
    I not long ago started relationship with Filipino Ladyboy. I like her personality. Hopefully relationship goes well. She is versatile sexualy. Also she much younger than myself. She seems to get easily aroused sexualy. I am not complaining. Though she is very pretty in looks, I just finding it sometimes difficult to please her sexualy every day. As she usually wants me to bottom and most days several times. Don't get me wrong, though I am feeling the age barrier can be a problem, especially when it involves intimacy.
  • John Smith
    Roles are fluid. I myself identify as a straight guy even though in the bedroom I’m the bottom. I’ve been involved with a Filipina ladyboy who initially identified as a bottom. I identified as the top. As our relationship progressed, she vocalized her desire to f*** me. I was hesitant at first but after a few times I came (lol) to love it. We’ve been together for 3 years and for more than 2 of them she’s been f***ing me. I’ve become a complete bottom in the need room even though im the masculine one in the outside world. I don’t see myself ever topping again and she doesn’t want to stop being the top. I love it, she loves it. Not an issue but she does get aroused so easily. I hope I can keep up with her.
    • James Garcia
      You are literally describing what my relationship is right now. Over ten years ago, I went to the Philippines (a BEAUTIFUL country) to find and experience intimacy with a ladyboy. I did everything I wanted to do and on my third trip back, I ended up finding a relationship and the love of my life. Our relationship started with her being the bottom and me the top. Six months, after we moved in together, she expressed her desire to penetrate me. While hesitant at first, she was so sweet and I couldn't say no to her. Five years later, she is the Dominant in the bedroom, I am the bottom and I am completely okay with it. I could never go back to topping and she has no desire to ever bottom again. It was nicely said, "Roles are fluid", they are. Granted, her Filipina appetite is hard to keep up with but I love it.

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