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Is your feeling Infatuation or LOVE

Amanda Valentine Dela Cruz
This post was last updated on .

It’s very common for people who have been single for a long time, mistake infatuation with love. That is why if you’re one of these people, you must keep reading. There’s a saying that one should not make decisions when they’re happy or sad. Don’t enter a relationship out of impulse!

What is Infatuation

According to the Oxford dictionary, it is a noun that pertains to an intense but short-lived passion or admiration for someone or something.

Infatuation

Common Signs

  • Being in Love after One Date. Loneliness can be palpable. So much so that it clouds our real emotions. This is why many of us have heightened infatuation after getting back in the game after a long time. The most common sign that you’re infatuated is if you develop very strong feelings in just a short period.
  • No Red Flags. An infatuated person doesn’t see red flags. When they’re dating someone, they tend to forget their research and focus on the other’s positive traits.
  • The One. Someone infatuated will think of wedding bells right off the bat. They’re the ones who often doodle their names in conjunction with their date’s surnames. They also go as far as where they’d live, how they’ll start a family, and the future events they’ll be attending as a couple.
  • Constant Chatter with Friends. If you have close friends, the first thing you’d do is spread the news. You’ll also ask for their opinion on the person you’re dating even if you’ve only met once.

Duration

Infatuation is temporary. This feeling often fleets after you discover the negative traits of your date. If this feeling is brought upon the other person’s looks, it’ll probably simmer down once their charm’s novelty wears off.

There is no exact time on how long this feeling will last. It all depends on the said circumstances.

Pros

There’s no harm in being infatuated. It’s quite a healthy feeling most especially if you’re lonely. But for it to be more effective, you must never commit to someone with who you feel infatuated. Try harnessing the same feelings from multiple people at once.

Have a single but dating mindset.

Cons

It will only destroy your emotions if you act upon it. If you enter a relationship via the infatuation route, you’re going to do things that you’re not supposed to do. The first thing that you’ll probably sacrifice is your self-worth.

Action

Having mild flirtation with different people and casting your net wide is the best way to go. By doing so, you’re giving your heart more time to blossom appropriately for the correct person. Only with time will you be able to know if you are compatible with someone or not.

What is Love?

It’s time to move on to something less trivial, love. Many definitions of this word are available online. But let’s stick to the most literal one. According to the Oxford dictionary, love is an intense feeling of deep affection. Unlike infatuation, it’s not short-lived.

Love

However, you must know that it’s also not eternal. It can be felt and given in numerous ways to numerous people or things. The reason why love has many definitions is that it’s not a one-size-fits-all kind of emotion. It’s more personal and only you can truly define it.

Common Signs

  • Sacrifice. Someone truly in love will be willing to sacrifice. Some even go to the point of losing their life for the one they love. If you’re willing to compromise or sacrifice for someone else, you’re probably in love.
  • Patience. They say that true love waits. This has been proven many times by couples who have been separated by war. In modern times, this often applies to people who have met through dating sites who are in a long-distance relationship. If you can wait for that person, you’re in love.
  • Loyalty. People who cheat say that it’s possible for them to love multiple people at the same time. While that’s arguable, loyalty is inarguably one of the best signs that show a person’s love. If you are content with who or what you have, that’s love.
  • Unconditional. What this means is that you’re loving someone not based on convenience or just because you’re benefiting. Looks fade, money problems come, and health deteriorates. When one of these situations or all of these happen to you and your partner yet you’re still holding on, it’s true love.

Duration

Love is 50-50. Sometimes, it lasts for a lifetime, and sometimes, it doesn’t. But unlike infatuation, it’s a smarter choice to gamble on.

Pros

When you truly love and every action you make is fueled by this feeling, you’ll never have regrets. Yes, not always will the other person love you back, but at the very least, you’ve loved with all your heart. Unlike with infatuation, you’re not leading someone on because you know to yourself that you’re genuinely in love.

Cons

But when the relationship is built upon the foundation of love and it’s broken, the damage is bigger. You must be ready for impending heartbreaks if you choose to love. Just like what they say in the casino, when you bet big, you win big.

Action

The best way to love is again, by giving yourself ample time to know the other person. Furthermore, you must also know their background and why their past relationships have ended. If you’ve been played like a fiddle numerous times, you must make smarter actions in your next relationship.

Furthermore, you must also love yourself. Only by doing so will you be able to end up with someone who truly deserves you. If you know your worth and you know how to draw boundaries, you will repel the wrong people. You will also have fewer chances of stumbling upon people who will only take advantage of you.

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Maki and Cyril

What are you waiting for? Now’s the perfect time to find love!

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About the author

Amanda Valentine Dela Cruz
Just a random trans woman playing with makeup and skincare. Loves bacon and the operating table. I'm also the author of the dating guide book Dating Transgender Women for Gentlemen. Know more -> dtwfgbook.com

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