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Dating Ladyboys Secretly

Amanda Valentine Dela Cruz
This post was last updated on .

Time and time again, notions in regards to men dating ladyboys, that they are secretly gay (not that there’s anything wrong with it) and that they have “weird” fetishes exist.

Furthermore, please do not use the word “fetish” lightly.

Going out with your ladyboy date shouldn’t feel like you’re a member of a secret society for closeted gay men. It will not only hurt your partner but yourself as well in the long run.

How will secrecy negatively impact your life?

You may feel like everything is going peachy on your side. You have a seemingly “perfect” normal life and you are keeping your ladyboy date on the down-low. You’re currently happy with the setup but it’s inevitable that people will find out about your relationship with your ladyboy girlfriend.

Hiding a secret is sometimes vital to living a worry-free life. However, you must know that everything eventually comes to light. In most cases, leaving things left unsaid can work well but when it comes to your dating life and certain notions that people have about you, you must learn the power of truth.

Ladyboys’ empathy

Ladyboys, most especially Asian ladyboys, are known to be highly empathetic individuals. The reason being is because a lot of them grew up in poverty and marginalization. Although most people would think that their situation is disadvantageous, these ladyboys are very good when it comes to dealing with people from all walks of life.

Maki and Cyril

Added to that, they’re more resilient and don’t give up so easily. This is why a lot of men tend to abuse them emotionally. They take them for granted because they know that a lot of ladyboys will put up with their shiz.

However, you must know that there are ladyboys who aren’t as patient as you think they are. Not everyone’s planning to take a path to martyrdom. She could only take so much. Don’t be surprised if she dumps you for constantly treating her like she’s a nasty little secret.

Don’t be lazy

Don’t rest on your laurels. Ladyboys have a lot of options most especially in My Ladyboy Date. Always remember that when it comes to dating them, you’ll stumble upon plenty of competition. Why would they stay with someone who feels embarrassed to be with them if they can easily find a man who will date them proudly?

Yes, who you date should not be anyone’s business. But if you truly go by this belief, why are you still dating your ladyboy girlfriend secretly? The biggest power that you have right now is the truth and if you let others exploit it, their notions will just be worse.

shy ladyboy

Some may think that you’re hiding in the closet. Others will think that you’re being unfair. The ones who you consider important to you may feel betrayed. These are the possible repercussions. Albeit there’s also a possibility that they would accept your preferences, are you willing to take the risk?

Why not just be upfront with the truth before others can out you in a dramatic way? If your circle really loves you, they will feel your honesty and sincerity. They will feel like you trust them and that the ladyboy you’re dating truly matters to you. This will leave them with no choice but to accept who you are and who you love.

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Is it HER or YOU?

Do you still secretly consider your ladyboy date as a “man” and it’s the very reason why you’re still afraid of people thinking you’re gay? Listen, Jerry, or whatever your name is, transgender women are WOMEN.

You don’t get to decide who they are by subconsciously making them feel that they are not women by you, having doubts about your own sexuality. Not only are they insulted by you, keeping her like she is a ticking time bomb from society, but they’re also insulted that you haven’t accepted them as women yet.

Figure yourself OUT

You have to know yourself and don’t just hop in a relationship with your ladyboy date just because you want to experiment with your sexuality. Know what you want (it can take years) before you impose yourself and compromise others’ lives for you.

guy searching in internet

Just like what RuPaul said,

“If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?”

Can I get an Amen? Seriously, you have to know, accept, and love yourself before trying to fully love others.

Without having self-love and knowing what you truly want in life, you will always be unsure. Having this kind of insecurity will not only impact your life. It will also confuse you on whether your feelings are real or not for ladyboys.

Be honest with yourself. Do you want ladyboys for a real relationship or do you only want them to be in bed with you? If it’s not the latter, you must be brave. Know that such an instance will require you to be one hundred percent SURE of yourself as a man.

Is it HER?

Maybe the reason why you’re still dating her secretly is because she’s not yet THE ONE. Not everyone finds it easy to come out and they’ll only take the risks if they’re sure of who they’re dating. Technically, it’s not her fault that you don’t like her but still, you must find the perfect partner to weather through the storm.

cute ladyboy

You see, no matter who it is, Thai ladyboy, Transpinay, etc., you must meet your soulmate. If you do, that’s when you’ll feel the fuel towards fighting for your love. Only then, you’ll find the reason why you shouldn’t date ladyboys secretly.

If you haven’t found the one for you yet, you must keep looking. Knowing if someone is the one is pretty easy. You’ll know if she’s the one when your decisions will be based more emotionally rather than logically. It’s a scary thing but the most beautiful love stories won’t be as exciting as they are if there are no hurdles involved.

You CAN’T let people know about your ladyboy date because…

Every individual experiences different circumstance in life. There are times when lives are put on the line just because of romantic choices. In this section, those circumstances will be elaborated.

You’ll be punished in your country

Sadly in 2020, some countries still punish people for dating who they want to date. There are certain laws against same-sex copulation that can not only hurt a person but could also prove lethal.


Some punishments involve lashing, hanging, and other forms of deadly activities. This is an understandable reason as to why you can’t date ladyboys publicly. However, you must also know that some ladyboys don’t enter relationships without having the hopes of marriage.

A lot of ladyboys on dating sites hope to find a partner to grow old with. Life’s unfair but you shouldn’t take the dream away from her. There’s only a limit to her, being able to endure being kept a secret. How far can she really go for love? How will you secure a future with her?

Your Career will be Ruined

Being ambitious is not a crime. However, letting others suffer for your ambition, most especially the ones who you claim to love, can be morally incriminating. How would you feel if your partner tells you how much they love you but their actions speak otherwise?

sad man

How would you feel if you can’t even do an activity with your loved one, such as something as simple as going to a restaurant for a dinner date? Will you be secure and know that your partner won’t leave you if you don’t know anyone they know? Who would you run to if your partner is missing?

Suffice to say, you will not have a hold of your partner. You won’t feel like you truly belong in their lives. You’ll always feel like your relationship with them is just all in your head and you’re only living in a fantasy.

She Encourages you to Date her Secretly

If your ladyboy girlfriend is ok with being kept as a secret, that’s on her. Good for you and good for her. But, why invest in something when you both know that it’s probably going to end up nowhere…

happy couple

Come on, be real for a moment here. Please don’t feel like that was created to ruffle your feathers. Stop being sensitive, you’re the jerk here lol.

What to Do?

This all boils down to knowing what you want. You must be at the state of your life whereby what others would say wouldn’t matter to you anymore. You must be in a situation whereby dating a ladyboy isn’t dangerous. She must not suffer because of your circumstances.

If you have not met your soulmate yet, there’s a huge possibility that she is in My Ladyboy Date. Why don’t you sign up and witness true love?

Posted in Love & relationships
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About the author

Amanda Valentine Dela Cruz
Just a random trans woman playing with makeup and skincare. Loves bacon and the operating table. I'm also the author of the dating guide book Dating Transgender Women for Gentlemen. Know more ->

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